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A lot of what you might assume about a small-time band struggling to find their way to fame probably is true.

The members of locally-based Death By Fame - who have received air time on major Boston stations - put in long hours and late nights, often receive little, if any, pay for their shows and are forever searching - and hoping - for someone to notice them.

But what you might not know is that they outlaw excessive partying, take their personal lives just as seriously as their music, and are actually a little jealous of their friends who have more stable careers.

"People went to college and now they're buying houses and getting married," said Neil Hanson, 28, lead guitar and lead vocals. "We're just getting by. This is what we want to do. But it's not easy."

Hanson, drummer Bob Kiklis, 27, and bass guitarist John Prata, 25, who also provides backing vocals, have been in the trying- to-make-it game together for about two years, but their passions and ties to each other run much longer. Kiklis, known more often as "Kika," and Hanson have been playing together in one form or another since just after high school and both were former members of the band Swift.

When Hanson left that group, because of another member's drug use, Kiklis tried to tough it out but also found himself unable to tolerate the unstable environment.

The two got back together, and picked up Prata, who had played with another band, through mutual friends. A spontaneous jam session quickly turned into recording a demo that lead to play on radio stations such as WBCN and WAAF, as well as college stations across the country.

They've also played at some of Boston's smaller, but widely popular, clubs, including The Middle East, Paradise and The Rack, and at venues in Rhode Island and New Hampshire.

There are thrills. Hearing themselves on the radio never gets old and Prata says playing live is "goose bumps every time." Often, their songs are played on air because of listener requests.

But the reality of not only making and recording music, but also promoting their band and playing shows while working regular jobs to pay rent is a world of hard work.

"Truth? Time is the biggest thing," Kiklis said. "Everything is in house. It's so much work, and you can only do so much (on your own). It's overwhelming."

"We're a struggling band, playing shows for sometimes nothing," Hanson said. "Without someone behind you, it's tough."

But they're not willing to settle. They're going to wait for the right label fit, and they gladly spend what money they do have on their own merchandising and promoting.

Shows are booked by networking and soliciting clubs, meeting other bands that mesh with their punk-rock sound to package shows, and maintaining a strong local fan base. Living their dream also is about maintaining a humble attitude.

"Last night, we played to a show of 20 people and 15 were from the other band," Hanson said. "But we met those guys, and they said they'd to play with us again. You just don't know, and you can't walk past it."

On the plus side, they still have time for family and friends, and they take those obligations to heart. The evening of this interview, a night off, Kiklis was going straight home to spend time with his family and Hanson had a movie date.

"My friends say, 'I wish I had the guts to do what you're doing.' My family is cool, they say we're good. But when they (say) 'when is enough is enough', that's..... it's never enough," Kiklis said.

The band currently is recording what will be their first packaged full-length album, which they hope to have in stores by January, at Zolla Productions in Norwood. They insist that all three contribute equally to the song-writing process, and that although they have plenty of material, not everything they write is about their own lives.

"I love the music we play. We're writing good music," Prata said. "That's rewarding. I don't think we've ever gotten into an argument. It just comes."

And how long will they wait for mainstream success to come their way? They are actively looking for a label and manager or, for that matter, someone to school them in public relations. They say they'll keep doing it until that happens or forever - which ever one comes first.

"I've always wanted to be a rock star, to travel the world and get paid to play music," Kiklis said. "This is the only thing I'm good at."

Hanson said he won't stop until he doesn't have to work a day job.

"I can't really see anything else," he said.

"I don't want to see it," Prata said.